March 17th (Tue)
G.B. likes Lee Marvin. Norma's Speech Day. All by myself! Aww. Frightening.
March 18th
Lee Marvin No. 1! 3rd week! J going on about sore thumb. 'It's broke' says she! Norma practiced her play with me. Billy Liar.
March 19th
House music competition. Miss Hatch lost her voice. Those awful girls nearly bashed us. Dad was annoying. Cried.
March 20th (Fri)
S & J came for tea. Took dog for a walk. Met Carol and friend Pat Taylor. When S and J had gone we had a talk about sex.
March 21st (Sat)
Fab day. Went up town with dad. Bought 12' trellis. Had it hanging out of boot on way home. Went to fab party at Tish's. Gigantic house. 3 storey.
March 22nd
Busy. Spring has come! Helped dad in garden. Played cards nearly all day with Norm. Sad about yesterday. United lost to Chelsea 2-1
March 23rd (mon)
Okay today. Got penfriend from France, called Lorette Lucas. Shirl visited. United drew with Leeds again! 0-0
March 24th
After school Carol came. We wrote a letter to Lorette. Saw her cat's kittens. "Place your litter here". Lady took us for a walk.
March 25 (Wed)
Broke up! (for Easter) All form had a detention for geog. Good! J came for dinner and I went there (to J's) for tea. I don't want Hulme to go comprehensive. Simon and Garfunkel no. 1.
March 26
United are out of FA Cup. Leeds beat us 1-0. Visited Susan Greenwood. Took Lady. Behaved strangely. Met lad (Norma's friend) called Martin. Nice character, not nice face.
March 27
Good Friday.Helped dad in garden. Ugh. Dig that sexy Mike Pratt who plays Randall. MMM. Cousin Audrey, Fred and Sandra came visiting.
March 28 (Sat)
Nice day. Tape recorder back. Great fun. Jean and Cath came and we played daft games on it. Dad parked wrong way in a one way street. Everyone helped. Snow.
March 29 (Sun)
Easter. Happy day. Did a lot of taping. Dad brought Easter eggs. Dad was a bit ill. Hope he's alright. Dead worried.
March 30
Rotten day. Dad been a bit touchy. Didn't do much. Started letter to JH. Mum cried 'cos of all sorts really. I'm sick. Lady's got a bad cold.
March 31st
Stayed at Shirley's.
Commentary
I think Mike Pratt must have been in 'Randall and Hopkirk deceased'. We had an old reel to reel tape recorder. Remember them? The tapes were about 5" in diameter, and each in a separate box.
Dad worked for a wholsale confectioner, so sample and reject Easter eggs and other sweets often came our way.
I think I may have been completely unaware of family dynamics.
Saturday, 27 March 2010
Thursday, 25 March 2010
Reading....
I finished reading Hilary Mantel's Wolf Hall a couple of weeks ago and it was so good I almost didn't recognise how good it was. She slipped me into Tudor England so easily, I took it for granted. At the same time I was listening to the audio book of Charles Dickens' Little Dorritt in the care (26 CDs!). Aren't I privileged to have access to such amazing books? Little Dorritt has such great characters. Wolf Hall got 10/10. Little Dorritt got 9.5/10. I have also read Anita Shrieve's Testimony - what a great way to construct a narrative - 8.5/10.
Now I'm reading The Street Philosopher by Matthew Plampin, recommended by a good friend, so am immersed in the Crimean War.
Desperately need a daft easy trashy novel to listen to in the car, while feeling overworked and stressed. Visit to library at weekend.
Now I'm reading The Street Philosopher by Matthew Plampin, recommended by a good friend, so am immersed in the Crimean War.
Desperately need a daft easy trashy novel to listen to in the car, while feeling overworked and stressed. Visit to library at weekend.
Saturday, 13 March 2010
My Diary 1971 March
No entries for March, apart from:
"Me and J joined Egerton St Youth Club during the time I didn't write my diary. Everyone warned us off. Said it would be rough.My dad said he didn't think I'd like it 'cos it was rough. Anyway we joined. Lonely at first but JP was there. She's alright by herself but with other people UGH!We met 3 girls called Denise, Karen and Lynn. All ok. Welllll.... Denise talks a lot, Karen is too quiet and Lynn is working. All people at youth club smoke. I don't like it much, only go to please J, but on April 27th found out she is only going to please me! Had a good laugh. Not going again.
"Me and J joined Egerton St Youth Club during the time I didn't write my diary. Everyone warned us off. Said it would be rough.My dad said he didn't think I'd like it 'cos it was rough. Anyway we joined. Lonely at first but JP was there. She's alright by herself but with other people UGH!We met 3 girls called Denise, Karen and Lynn. All ok. Welllll.... Denise talks a lot, Karen is too quiet and Lynn is working. All people at youth club smoke. I don't like it much, only go to please J, but on April 27th found out she is only going to please me! Had a good laugh. Not going again.
My Diary 1970 March (i)
March 1st (Sun)
Went to baths with Cath. Nearly lost temper with her. Made some coconut ice, turned out a flop. HUMPH. I nearly got angry with Mum and Norma for calling Cath.
March 2nd (Mon)
We tried to find something to do for history thing. Not very successful. Dad brought new car. Fab "Cortina". Got new school schoes. My temper's been kept!
March 3rd (Tues)
Rehearsed history play and put it on for Miss Roker. Flop! Frightened of girls who are going to bash us up on Frederick St.
March 4th (Wed)
Lee Marvin No.1 GOODY!
March 5th
Went up town with J and S. Felt guilty at leaving CS to go down Fred St alone (them girls). Bought a card for Mother's Day.
March 6th (Fri)
Carol was alright yesterday. Made a bit of a card for Mum's Day. Those girls from Grange School frightened us again. Decided to report them to school.
March 7th (Sat)
Finished card for mum. Helped dad to clear floods (not bad) from his works. Had night to myself. Tried make-up.
March 8th (Sun)
Mum was pleased with card. Boring day really.
March 9th
Didn't report Grange girls (like the cowards we are). Decided to warn them. Didn't see them! Dad in bad temper. Him and his plants.
March 10th (Tues)
Saw G girls (only 2). But Miss Roker was behind (so we couldn't shout). Roker gets on my nerves! Put some awful stingy stuff on my wart. Ugh!
March 11th (wed)
Nice day! (believe it or not) Had hair trimmed. Got off P.E. because of period and headache. Lee Marvin No. 1
March 12th
3rd day of wart cure. Thoughht it would be an awful day but it turned out nice. Introduced to some boys 'Raz' and Andy. Raz looks okay. Bathed Lady 'cos of mud!
March 13th (Fri)
Reported G. girls 'cos of nasty threats. 2 girls expelled from Hulme (not 'cos they were pregnant either) 'cos of bad conduct. Boys! (!)
March 14th (Sat)
Visited Antony and Susan. He was having a party. Busy day. Helped wash car. Humph. United drew with Leeds 0-0 in FA semi-final. Chelsea through!
March 15th
Norma kept going on about dentists, dentists, dentists.
March 16th (Mon)
Girls nearly got us. What is God? Is he a person or just a feeling? Done a lot of thinking about religion.
Commentary
I can't recall who Cath was. Miss Roker was the scariest teacher we had. She wouldn't hesitate to throw a board-duster at you. She was short and stocky, in tweeds and brogues. I went to grammar school. We lived in constant fear that girls from the local comprehensive schools would ambush us. My school was Hulme. I am now perplexed as to what bad conduct would have had to be committed to get expelled...
Went to baths with Cath. Nearly lost temper with her. Made some coconut ice, turned out a flop. HUMPH. I nearly got angry with Mum and Norma for calling Cath.
March 2nd (Mon)
We tried to find something to do for history thing. Not very successful. Dad brought new car. Fab "Cortina". Got new school schoes. My temper's been kept!
March 3rd (Tues)
Rehearsed history play and put it on for Miss Roker. Flop! Frightened of girls who are going to bash us up on Frederick St.
March 4th (Wed)
Lee Marvin No.1 GOODY!
March 5th
Went up town with J and S. Felt guilty at leaving CS to go down Fred St alone (them girls). Bought a card for Mother's Day.
March 6th (Fri)
Carol was alright yesterday. Made a bit of a card for Mum's Day. Those girls from Grange School frightened us again. Decided to report them to school.
March 7th (Sat)
Finished card for mum. Helped dad to clear floods (not bad) from his works. Had night to myself. Tried make-up.
March 8th (Sun)
Mum was pleased with card. Boring day really.
March 9th
Didn't report Grange girls (like the cowards we are). Decided to warn them. Didn't see them! Dad in bad temper. Him and his plants.
March 10th (Tues)
Saw G girls (only 2). But Miss Roker was behind (so we couldn't shout). Roker gets on my nerves! Put some awful stingy stuff on my wart. Ugh!
March 11th (wed)
Nice day! (believe it or not) Had hair trimmed. Got off P.E. because of period and headache. Lee Marvin No. 1
March 12th
3rd day of wart cure. Thoughht it would be an awful day but it turned out nice. Introduced to some boys 'Raz' and Andy. Raz looks okay. Bathed Lady 'cos of mud!
March 13th (Fri)
Reported G. girls 'cos of nasty threats. 2 girls expelled from Hulme (not 'cos they were pregnant either) 'cos of bad conduct. Boys! (!)
March 14th (Sat)
Visited Antony and Susan. He was having a party. Busy day. Helped wash car. Humph. United drew with Leeds 0-0 in FA semi-final. Chelsea through!
March 15th
Norma kept going on about dentists, dentists, dentists.
March 16th (Mon)
Girls nearly got us. What is God? Is he a person or just a feeling? Done a lot of thinking about religion.
Commentary
I can't recall who Cath was. Miss Roker was the scariest teacher we had. She wouldn't hesitate to throw a board-duster at you. She was short and stocky, in tweeds and brogues. I went to grammar school. We lived in constant fear that girls from the local comprehensive schools would ambush us. My school was Hulme. I am now perplexed as to what bad conduct would have had to be committed to get expelled...
Monday, 15 February 2010
3 things from this weekend that made me think
1) I saw A Midsummer Night's Dream at the Bolton Octagon. Not the best version I have seen, but the first professional play I have seen with disabled actors honestly integrated into the cast, putting their abilities and disabilities up front for all to see. Actually they were not disabled; they were just actors.
2) Paul and I went for a walk on a canal tow-path in Burnley. We saw a sunk narrow boat. It had only recently gone down. Maybe the ice got it? There were a pair of flip-flops on the roof, as if someone had left them out before going to bed. There was a mat hanging to dry on the tiller-arm.
3) Driving home from the canal, we drove through some of the back-streets of Burnley. Rows of terraced houses, largely occupied by Asian families - maybe from Pakistan or Bangladesh. As we looked down one street we could see black smoke pouring out of a front door. Paul slammed the brakes on. I ran up the street. Someone was just phoning the fire-brigade on his mobile. I ran to hammer on the doors of the houses on either side of the one on fire. No-one came out. But other neighbours started to come out, and some moved their cars. Two fire-engines turned up within 5 minutes. The smoke had changed from black to white, and was now billowing out of the door and the two front windows. Some of the windows popped out with the heat and flames, and we could hear explosions inside. As far as we now no-one was in the house.
Paul and I left as they were getting the water hoses laid out. There were crowds of people, Asian and white, concerned and rousing people from the other houses on the street.
I've never seen a house on fire, except on TV. The houses are crammed so close together, they face each other with only a few yards between. The whole community is so vulnerable to a fire in one house. I used to live in a house like that, as a child, and I loved being so close to everyone.
2) Paul and I went for a walk on a canal tow-path in Burnley. We saw a sunk narrow boat. It had only recently gone down. Maybe the ice got it? There were a pair of flip-flops on the roof, as if someone had left them out before going to bed. There was a mat hanging to dry on the tiller-arm.
3) Driving home from the canal, we drove through some of the back-streets of Burnley. Rows of terraced houses, largely occupied by Asian families - maybe from Pakistan or Bangladesh. As we looked down one street we could see black smoke pouring out of a front door. Paul slammed the brakes on. I ran up the street. Someone was just phoning the fire-brigade on his mobile. I ran to hammer on the doors of the houses on either side of the one on fire. No-one came out. But other neighbours started to come out, and some moved their cars. Two fire-engines turned up within 5 minutes. The smoke had changed from black to white, and was now billowing out of the door and the two front windows. Some of the windows popped out with the heat and flames, and we could hear explosions inside. As far as we now no-one was in the house.
Paul and I left as they were getting the water hoses laid out. There were crowds of people, Asian and white, concerned and rousing people from the other houses on the street.
I've never seen a house on fire, except on TV. The houses are crammed so close together, they face each other with only a few yards between. The whole community is so vulnerable to a fire in one house. I used to live in a house like that, as a child, and I loved being so close to everyone.
The truth, and my teenage diaries
I have had two conversations this weekend, about me altering things in my teenage diaries before I publish them here. As someone who has taken a social constructionist perspective in research, I understand that there is the truth, then there is the truth..... This ties in with a lecture I delivered recently on our on-line Masters programme.
When I wrote my secret 5 year diary in the 1970s I was giving a representation of my own version of events - what I would have said was the truth. This was clearly impacted on by some conscious distortion, but also by my need to create a certain personal identity narrative. What I wrote was also influenced by my age, the era and my hormones, as well as my personality. I was of my class, my gender and the '70s. So the socio-political influences, as well as the personal, helped construct the account I gave of myself.
Now here I am 40 years later, re-presenting my teenage representation of myself. The current socio-political climate, my development in terms of gender, class, education etc all have an impact on how I construe what I said then, and how I choose to transform it in the telling here and now (are you keeping up?)
If I choose not to report my grumpy jealous feelings, who am I protecting? If I leave in my comments about the Common Market, but not about my relationships, then I am clearly constructing an image, consciously, to some extent.
I am drivelling on in this vain because my sister said that I shouldn't attempt to make my 1970 diary entries politically correct to 2010 standards. (In my February(II) 1970 entry, I have said that Norma's friend Canchan was an Indian, when in fact, in my diary I called her coloured. This now makes me cringe, but, actually, at the time, I was being politically correct, although pc, as a term, wasn't in use then. In fact, Canchan was a Ugandan Asian, a refugee from Idi Amin's rule.
Another really interesting problem I had in transcribing, was that I put that my mum's birthday slippers cost 9sh 11d. In fact, in my real diary, I had put 9/11. This has such a different meaning nowadays that I chose not to use it.
My running friends say that I should leave all my jealousies and paranoias in my accounts, because these are fairly typical of the insecurities of all 13 year old girls. Not totally convinced about this. It could end up with my current relationships with old friends suffering! The truth may continue not to be fully out....
The overall outcome of this is that I have decided that, where appropriate, I will have to put a little commentary on diary sections. A bit like film directors do on DVDs.
When I wrote my secret 5 year diary in the 1970s I was giving a representation of my own version of events - what I would have said was the truth. This was clearly impacted on by some conscious distortion, but also by my need to create a certain personal identity narrative. What I wrote was also influenced by my age, the era and my hormones, as well as my personality. I was of my class, my gender and the '70s. So the socio-political influences, as well as the personal, helped construct the account I gave of myself.
Now here I am 40 years later, re-presenting my teenage representation of myself. The current socio-political climate, my development in terms of gender, class, education etc all have an impact on how I construe what I said then, and how I choose to transform it in the telling here and now (are you keeping up?)
If I choose not to report my grumpy jealous feelings, who am I protecting? If I leave in my comments about the Common Market, but not about my relationships, then I am clearly constructing an image, consciously, to some extent.
I am drivelling on in this vain because my sister said that I shouldn't attempt to make my 1970 diary entries politically correct to 2010 standards. (In my February(II) 1970 entry, I have said that Norma's friend Canchan was an Indian, when in fact, in my diary I called her coloured. This now makes me cringe, but, actually, at the time, I was being politically correct, although pc, as a term, wasn't in use then. In fact, Canchan was a Ugandan Asian, a refugee from Idi Amin's rule.
Another really interesting problem I had in transcribing, was that I put that my mum's birthday slippers cost 9sh 11d. In fact, in my real diary, I had put 9/11. This has such a different meaning nowadays that I chose not to use it.
My running friends say that I should leave all my jealousies and paranoias in my accounts, because these are fairly typical of the insecurities of all 13 year old girls. Not totally convinced about this. It could end up with my current relationships with old friends suffering! The truth may continue not to be fully out....
The overall outcome of this is that I have decided that, where appropriate, I will have to put a little commentary on diary sections. A bit like film directors do on DVDs.
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