Niall Williams - Just finished reading............

As it is in Heaven by Niall Williams

7/10

This was lent to me by a friend, after I admired Colm Toibin's Brooklyn. Another elequent Irish writer, slow paced and skilled in savouring words and language.
It's a love story in more ways than one - the love of a man for a woman, the love of music, the love of a father for his son, the love of a man for his dead wife.
I got frustrated because it moved so slowly. I nearly abandoned it. In fact I did something very unusual for me - I peeped near the end of the book to see where it was going. I didn't abandon it, and I'm so glad I didn't because it becomes a compulsive story.
I thought I knew how it ended but the author packed a punch in that I hadn't seen coming despite my peeping.

I will read more of Niall Williams I expect.

My secret diary 1973 April - VAT, revision and beauty treatment

April 1 (Sun)
April Fool's Day (no jokes), Mothers Day (got mum some flowers. Proper pressy later). V.A.T. Day - new tax. I feel really tired all of a sudden. Done hardly any revision. Been doing homework and reading and sulking all day. Might cost £60 to go on holiday. Dad didn't seem too worried!!

April 2
You see nobody listens to what I have to say and then when they do listen I make a mess of it. It makes me feel insignificant. Maybe because I'm just another 'Unknown Citizen'. I'm so sad. Dad's been working solidly the last few days on VAT and he's ill with his ulcer. And he lost his temper with mum, and mum and Norma argued, and I shorted one of the main fuses and now the lights aren't working in the living room and I hate this house and I just feel like crying.

April 3
They're still not listening to me. Sometimes I say something and they just start talking about something else. They don't mean to, but one day I'm going to get so annoyed. Norma's given me a skirt (long black silky maxi with little white dots) - lovely. Music competition* at school - boring as usual. Started a wee bit of revision. I'm fed up. Keep getting a pain in my head.

April 4
Break up tomorrow for Easter hols - 'O' levels soon afterwards. Oh what's the matter with me? I feel like crying again. Dad's in a bad mood 'cos he's been working late - he takes it out on mum. TVs all wrong again.

April 5
Behind with diary. I've slept out at Ju's for 3 nights, or Ju's slept here. We went to Royton catholic Club Folk night - great, fell in love with a fella who looks like a french onion seller! He's only little like me - a singer. Dead good night - S.O came - we slept at Ju's.

April 6
Went home for dinner time, after going to dentist with Ju. Finished the beautiful black silky skirt with white spots that N gave me and we (me, J, S.O, C and a girl called Claire) went to the Whiskers and had a really great freak out. Dave's sister was there so were some of the girls from the shop.

April 7
Slept at Ju's last night and had a lovely lazy morning just dancing and being happy. After dinner went to Asda, where Ju's got a job (Sats). Went to see mum and dad who were looking at washers. In doing a good deed (carrying mum's shopping out), a horrid old man nearly arrested us for pilfering! He made me and Ju look stupid in front of the whole store but when mum came up with receipt he was ever so nice. Typical!

April 8 (Sun)
Ju slept last night. I feel like crying. Don't know why, it's silly really. You see we did some revision then we went to see the Oldham Tinkers at the Oldham Hotel* with Norma and K, but me and Ju left early, Ju to catch last bus and me 'cos I was tired and also wanted to catch last bus and not have to depend on N and K to pay a taxi for me. N and K fussed about it and didn't want me to go. It's made me feel uncomfy now. I'm tired.

April 9
Quite pleased with myself. Although I got up late I've done quite a bit of revision (physics, all electromag and a bit of magnetism). Not much else to say. Oh that goregeous Graham who worked at the Spar has gone and joined the army today (sob). Forgot to phone Ju.

April 10
Oh yawn, yawn, groan, groan. I'm really, really tired. Got up late this morning, started chemistry revision. After dinner went to visit SG but she was at school so came home and revised some more. Done quite a bit (1 1/2 books out of 6 1/2) Ju phoned and we made arrangements about Thursday. C isn;t coming. Goodnight.

April 11
Hardly anything to write. A lazy day really. Done some Russ vocab but that's all. Done a beauty treatment tonight. Washed hair (used vinegar, oil and perfume), steamed and cleansed face and done eyebrows (drastically). Going to folk club tomorrow night. I love everyone!


*Commentary
April 3 - my school had an annual music competition. I think that people could win points towards the inter-house competition, as well as prestige. I ddin't have a musical bone in my body, so never entered. I seem to recall that we had to sit on the floor in the main hall listening to endless renditions of 'The Ash Grove', 'Claire de Lune' and 'Greensleeves' on the piano or the recorder.
April 8 - this is (was?) a pub in Oldham. Did I tell you that my mum and dad first met there? It would have been shortly after the war and mum was attracted to dad partly because he had a watch and an overcoat, so she thought he must be well off.

My secret diary 1973 - a quick catch up for March

Here is a thematic summary of what this 16 year old got up to in March 1973

FRIENDS AND LEISURE
We all got free tickets to go to an over-19s 'Girlie Night' at the Cat's Whiskers in Oldham. We were very excited. It was great - we had a terrific time. Only drank Coke. We entered a 'Funky Chicken' competition.
Some girls at school planning a big party.
Reading third book of the Gormenghast trilogy - Titus Alone.
Joined S's youth club, where we spent an evening jiving.
Went with Ju and her mum and dad to new social club opposite them - enjoyed it.
6 of us had a great night out dancing at the Cat's Whiskers - jiving and twisting and all kinds of things. Ju trapped with a gorgeous boy who she might see again. One chap kept putting his hands on my hips, but I didn't care for him. All stayed over at my house. We didn't get to sleep until 4.30am great fun.

LOVE LIFE
Rob didn't phone, 1st March. Then on 3rd March Rob and I went to see a play, George and Margaret' at the Oldham Coliseum. On the way home we had a row. It turned out that Dave's (Julie's ex) sister had seen us at the Cat's Whiskers last night and told Dave and Rob. And so I finished with Rob, more or less. He was very upset. I was very upset that I had upset someone so much.
March 5th Rob phoned to ask me to school dance. He bought tickets for us. (this is a cliffhanger - as I write this I don't know what will happen next!!!).
March 9th, school dance, held at Chaddy Grammar, I was horrid to Rob, Ju and Dave had a big row, we all finshed our relationships and I stayed over at Ju's. I regretted the unfreindly ending to the relationahip, but was glad it was over.
Started dreaming of Jerry who I met at Butlins last year.
March 17th, returned Rob's record player. He was very cold. He said 'thanks. Ta-ra'

FAMILY
Norma home from uni. Had her hair cut and I thought it loooked nice.
On a sunny Sunday dad and I went out driving in the car. He liked to see if we could spot any horse manure on the streets, so we could shovel it up into a bucket and put it on the garden. (You have to bear in mind we lived in a town with lots of terraced streets, few green bits and few trees. Our garden was probably about 24 square foot in total. Finding a pile of steaming horse-poo was a treat!)
Mum was upset because I wrote a letter to Norma and never mentioned mum once.
Auntie Emma visited.
Loved it when Norma came home from university to see us.
We all put a bet on the Grand National. I didn;t win anything.
Went to town and got flowers for mum, for mothers day.
Had row with Norma.

SCHOOL
Too much homework from Miss Hatch. Too much homeowrk from all teachers. Working solidly each evenng. Crying about it.
We got our 'O' level timetables.
Mr Higgins the music teacher discussed Gormenghast with me, but he didn't finish it. Didn't like it.
I got a slide-rule to do my calculations on and started to learn to use it.
Ju and I got told off by a prefect for talking in assembly
A day off for speech day..
Chose HG Wells as my topic for Russian 'O' level prep.
Teachers played 6th form at hockey - fun to watch.

POLITICAL AND SOCIAL COMMENT
8th March "My God!! Today about 7 car bombs were planted in front of nearly every important building in London. 2 went off. Injured 180 people and a man was kiled. IRA believed to be responsible. They're lunatics!"

MOOD AND HEALTH
Sad, depressed, fed up.
9th March I had nearly a perfect day, I claim. Weather nice, teachers nice, good school report.
New brace from dentist.
Later in month, hated life, hated the world, bored. Nothing in my life but homework. Mum and dad said I looked ill. I wondered if I had tonsilitis.
Crying over a Russian translation which was taking me too long. Too hard. Dad told me to stop, but scared of Miss Hatch.
Great wopping spot on chin, which I later described as a boil.
Then developed lump on neck.
Spurts of happiness occasionally.

OTHER
Early March was lovely and sunny and it lifted everyone's spirits.

My secret diary 1973 - a quick catch up for Jan and Feb

Dear Reader
Oh dear, oh dear. I have not reported on my secret diary since 20th Jan 1973. It's just like back in my real diary-keeping days, when I used to miss entries, making feeble excuses.

So, I have a plan, to try to get up to the end of March 1973 before March 2012 ends.
My plan is this - I will do a thematic summary of everything that happened to me from Jan 20th to March 31st 1973. Then I will get back to reporting verbatin again (well, that's what I'm promising, anyway!).


Thematic summary begins here:-


MOOD & HEALTH
Very depressed in January, while revising. I wanted to step off the planet and I thought I was cracking up.
February - crying before school because of Russian lessons. (did other people feel like this?). Moody, tearful, upset. (is it just that I only reported these emotions to my diary?)

POLITICAL VIEWS & COMMENT
Jan 23rd - peace in Vietnam announced by President Nixon. I described it as 'one star in the dark night of exams' :-/
end of Jan I comment that there is still fighting going on, so still not real peace.
February 'what am I going to do about vivisection?' I ask myself.

SCHOOL
In January I was finding it very hard revising for mock 'O' levels. I described the exams as 'not bad', 'terrible', 'not very delightful'. Russian was particularly terrifying because of my fear of Miss Hatch. I was reading Northanger Abbey and Macbeth for English.
Exam results come in and they don't seem too bad, but I usually comment that I could have done better.
Careers talk at school, but I don't name my aspirations.
School report not bad.
Too much Russian homework. I hate Miss Hatch.

FRIENDS
Julie and I virtually living at each others houses - we were always staying over with each other.
February - for some reason Ju and I did a shift working at Ju's dad's wood factory one Sunday morning.
S made me a T shirt with a picture of Snoopy on it. Miss Hatch picked on E, not me, for a change.
A bunch of us went to The Parochial Youth Club and one of my pals entered th talent competition, singing 'The Universal Soldier' and she won. We all had a great time dancing.
Decided not to write to French pen-friend again, because she never replies.

FAMILY
In January Norma brought her friend Kanchan, who was Kenyan, home from university to stay with us. It was exotic to have someone foreign to stay.
February - Dad had his car stolen from outside the house.
Niggly with mum.
Very worried that I owe dad £2 and Norma £1 and mum's birthday coming up.
Mum and dad both poorly.
Norma home from uni, and then went back.
Dad got flashy new car. We went in it to see Auntie Emma, in Sheffield. I loved driving over the snowy moors.
Mum's birthday. I got her some chocolates, but I was moody with her. I was in a bad mood because of Russian (and because I was a sulky teenager).
Dad's stolen car was found in Darlington.

LOVE LIFE
In January Rob wants to spend more time with me and I want my time to revise.
February - Folk nights at the Manchester Sports and Social Guild with Rob, Julie and Dave. We saw Martin Carthy on Feb 17th.
Rob and Dave went a week without phoning us and we started to panic and wonder whether to phone them.
Then they phoned. Then Ju told me she had finished with Dave. I was worried by this.
We both exchanged Valentine's cards with our respective boyfriends. I thought Rob's was too serious.
I lusted after James Taylor.
Decide I want to finish with Rob and keep writing about it.
Had a big row with him on the phone because I wouldn't go to see the film 'Woodstock' with him, because I had no money, and I said that I didn;t want him always paying for me. He put his mum on the phone to persuade me. Then my dad had a go at me about it, and said I was being horrible to Rob.
Another day, on phone to Rob for an hour, and it sounds like I was rude to him and sulky.
Rob had a party. Big Disaster. Ju and Dave had a row. I took her for a walk to calm her down. I thought Rob's friend, Keith, might fancy me.
Ju finished with Dave officially.



LEISURE LIFE
January - none!
February - me, Ju and some other pals celebrated end of exams by going dancing. I lied to Rob to get that night free.
Saw 'The Dambusters' and thought it was a great film.
Reading Titus Groan by Mervyn Peake. 'Terrific'. Then reading the second book, 'Gormenghast'
Bit of crochet.
United won!
A lot of going up town shopping.
Saw Fairport Convention on telly - great!

OTHER THINGS
It snowed a lot in February. Then one day I noted the hail, rain and snow all day.

My secret diary 1973 January (ii) Working too hard and dilemmas of romance

Dear Reader - these are edited extracts from my secret teenage diary 1973

Jan 11 (Thur)
Cold and v tired. !st Russian lesson of the year today - not bad. Revising hard. Rob phoned. He was bored.

jan 12
Friday, Friday! Work is getting on top of me. work all the time. Carol lent me her 'Spinners' LP. Nice.

Jan 13
Didn't do much revision. Went up town with Norma. Load of shopping and trapsing round. After went to a party with Rob, Ju and Dave and everyone (Ollie, Brin etc) It was quite good (at least there were girls there). I walked Rob to the top of Oxford St.

Jan 14
Ran Norma down to Birmingham. She sits her finals soon. I hope she does well. I've done a beautiful job of self-control tonight. I was going to phone Rob when mum and dad had gone out and ask him to come round, but I didn't. I revised.

Jan 15
Sometimes I want to say I hate school but I can't because my dad is paying so much for me to go to school. Bloody mock O levels start on 24th Jan. Rob phones every night now. Ju had a row with her dad.

Jan 16
Tired. Miss Hatch actually smiled at me today.

Jan 17
Me and Ju have a problem. Dave and Rob want us to go to the Manchester Sports Guild fold club on Sat, but E is having a party! Ju had row with Dave

Jan 18
Oh Gosh. S was upset because she thinks her dad has heart trouble. He has seen the same doctor that my dad saw. Dr Janus. V good. Told Rob I'm not going out on Sat night - I'm revising.

Jan 19
I'm tired. I have to revise this weekend. What to do about Saturday night?

Jan 20
Did quite a lot of chemistry revision. Ju stayed over. we invited Rob and Dave over for the evening. Wasn't bad really. I was a bit depressed. Snowed hard.

My secret diary 1973 January (i) Joining the EEC, learning how to sell cigarettes and pondering love

Dear reader. I have a sore neck and so I can only use the computer minimally at the moment. BUT - I do so want to get the January 1973 of my secret diary written up before the end of January 2012. Here than are the edited highlights from the first week or so.
16 year old, working hard at school, living with mum and dad, sister at university. Best friends with Julie and going out with first serious boyfriend, who I am worried about.

Edited highlights.
Jan 1st (Mon)
Hello 1973! Feel like crying. Mum and Norma teasing me about Rob. I wish they'd stop. Going to pictures with him tonight. Britain joined the EEC today, along with Eire and Denmark. 9 altogether. GOOD.

Jan 2nd
Sat writing this by candlelight. Why? because I feel like it! Went to see Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid with Rob. He's getting too serious.

Jan 3rd
Uncle Joe died just before the New Year. I didn't know him very well. There's only Fred, Emma, May, mum and Elsie left now. Don't mean to sound morbid.

Jan 4th
Went to town with Ju. Bought nail varnish and some dye for Norma. Auntie Emma came to stay (for the funeral)

Jan 5th
Today was Uncle Joe's funeral. I met my Uncle Fred for the first time. He seems nice enough but dad can't stand him Don't know why. We had Elsie, Vincent and Caroline for tea. They're all pretty nice. Rob called on his way to Brin's and asked to borrow Melanie.

Jan 6th
Bit of revision. Tonight went to Manchester Sports Guild with Rob, Ju and Dave. It was great - a folk-club-type thing. We saw Mary Asquith and the Taverners. On the train on the way home . . .*

Jan 7th
Ju stayed over and we did a lot of revision all day.

Jan 8th
Oh no - back to school on Wed. Done hardly any revision! Went to Dad's works to learn how to operate the cigarette till. Oh it's frightening!! My tooth thing that I wear a night broke, so dentist tomorrow.

Jan 9
Revised all day expect for watching TV and going to Manchester to see dentist. I don't have to wear the elastic things any more. Going to a party at Tony's next Saturday.

Jan 10
Oh back to Bloomin' school! Carried tons of books in. We didn't have Russian because it was first lesson and we had to choose monitresses. Mrs Stanton was a bit nasty. It was okay. I hope I'm not falling in love with Rob. At least getting a bit affectionate towards him.

*Commentary
Jan 6th - and then I write something secret using Russian letters, half of which I don't understand, but I can make out that it was to do with canoodling on the train. Some things must remain secret.

Alice Munro - Just abandoned reading . . . .

The View from Castle Rock by Alice Munro


5/10


Sorry - this book was recommended by a facebook friend when I was looking for Canadian authors to read, but I can't finish it. This is more my inadequacy that Alice Munro's.
She has given me such a fantastic insight into what life must have been like for the early migrants to America and Canada - how they established themselves, and the challenges they faced (and, I suppose, the different challenges of the next few generations). But I kept thinking 'what is the story here?'. I just want a novel to tell me a story, and this was more like short stories, along the theme of her family. It is an admirable book, and if I were reading it on holiday, uninterrupted by real life, I think I might appreciate it better. I don't really do short stories.