My secret diary 1973 September (iv) - a funeral and musing on religion

Sept 27th (Thurs)
Even less to say  than yest. Mr H's funeral tomorrow. Ju going. She'll be so upset, and Mrs H too. Got microscope mended. Lower sixth sending flowers and we are too (mum, dad and me).

Sept 28th
Ju didn't come to school today. It was her dad's funeral. - I haven't heard from her. Didn't expect to. We sent dome flowers. I keep wanting to cry for all of them. They'll be okay, won't they? Wondering whether to send her the James Taylor card* 'You've got a friend'. School is v hard work. I'm tired all the time.

Sept 29th (Sat)
Not a tremendously exciting day.
Taking an interest in Buddhism. V interesting and nice. Done no homework. Phoned Ju.

Sept 30th
Didn't do half as much work as I should have done. Wish I could have a new character - I'd love to be a Buddhist. Hmm can you imagine me in a witness box swearing a Buddhist oath? It'd mean more than a Christian one to me. Blasphemy! Poor ol' Julie, I guess I'm lucky in a way.

*Commentary
Sept 28 - Julie had given me this for my birthday the previous year. We still have it. It has crossed between us at times when reaching out has been needed.

My secret diary 1973 September (iii) - a terrible time

Sept 21st (Fri)
Today informed that 4 of us get cheques on Speech day for getting 5 or more 1s in 'O' levels - chuff chuff. Annoyed 'cos ju said she's phone me last night and she didn't.

Sept 22nd (Sat)*
Oh my god. Ju's grandma phoned this morning - I wondered what was happening - Ju told me - her dad, Mr H, has died. Julie's dad. What can I do? They think it was a heart attack - I'm so worried for her. I'm so afraid. What can I do? Went to the Indian evening in aid of Oxfam. Dad said I should occupy myself.

Sept 23rd
Oh Jesus Christ. I feel like crying. I phoned Julie up today to see how she was and if she wanted anything. She asked me if I wanted to go to cousin J's party and help. Oh and her mum kept crying and julie did. And R was so quiet. And he's only 6 and he's got to be brought up. He sat out of all the games. He was very quiet and J kept talking.

Sept 24th (Mon)
I'm so tired and so selfish. I always seem to be thinking of me and not Julie. She came to school today and wasn't too bad, but Miss Hatch upset her so much, I felt like crying for her. Poor Julie. I'm going to see Hatch tomorrow. Dad says I should, so does S. Julie hasn't got a dog to say silly things to and I have.

Sept 25th
Ju didn't come to school today - I didn't see Miss Hatch. I saw Miss Rogerson instead - she's v nice. She mentioned it to Hatch, who hadn't seen the notice about it in the staff room. Hatch was upset and nearly crying. Been an altogether depressing day. Everyone sad. No-one happy. So quiet.

Sept 26th (Wed)
I'm very tired. There's nothing to say. Ju at school today, Miss Hatch okay. I keep feeling like I want to cry at silly things.


*Note
Sept 22 - I have only been able to transcribe these parts of my diary because Julie has given me permission to do so.

My secret diary 1973 September (ii) - birthdays and bad tempers

Sept 8th (Sat) 
Went into town with dad and Norma. Got new school skirt and also rubber gloves for chemistry. Norma got a cassette recorder and some rollers. OK day. Ju phoned and suggested going to Royton Club. It was a boring couple singing and then Jerry came over to chat Julie up.

Sept 9th
Been in a rotten mood all day. Slept over at Ju's last night and came all the way home with no shoes on. Auntie May visited - ok. I think I've become more restless since the holiday. I wish I could go back to that campsite again, to Franz and Simple Simon. I'm in love with Jean-Pierre. No kidding.

Sept 10th
Well. School  might be harder work in the sixth form, but it's not as frightening now we don't have Miss Hatch. Went up town after school to look for pressy for Norma, met Norma, put an end to pressy search!! Not much to write. Oh - S is not coming back to school because of her 'O' levels. I wish she were.

Sept 11th (Tue)
Not much to write and anyway I don't feel like writing. Went swimming (at school). Had a double art lesson. OK at school except F is hanging about a bit and she is irritating me.

Sept 12th
After school went into town with Ju to get Norma's present. Got her a Melanie cassette (Candles in the Rain), a paint box and sketch pad. I'm v tired.

Sept 13th
Norma's b'day. She was pleased with pressy. Mum was getting at Kate for some reason (Kate couldn't afford pressy yet) Doing a lot of work at school. Seem to be permanently tired. Me and Ju and S and C are going to dance at the Plough on Saturday I think. Goodnight. Peace and Happiness.

Sept 14th (Fri)
Very tired, but made a prefect at school, so it made up for it I guess. Nearly lost my other contact lens in assembly (got replacement yesterday). S volunteered me to give a talk on Hinduism in R.I. Good grief!! I'm tired, I'm tired, so much work to do.

Sept 15th
Spent day doing homework and going up town with mum. At night me and Ju and R, F and C went to new disco called 'Looking Glass' at Plough Inn. It was really well done up inside - like Alice in Wonderland - music grotty - all Tamla - After I slept over at Ju's. A bit annoyed because she wouldn't stay over here.

Sept 16th (Sun)
We spent a while at Ju's eating and faffing then we set off late for Carol's - she'd invited us for tea. Really good time - listening to records etc, talking. It was fun. Really interesting. I like C.

Sept 17th
Don't feel like taking. too tired. Going on course about computers* I think. Nowt else to say. Bye.

Sept 18th
I think I'm going to cry, don't kno why. Just feel depressed, sick and tired. Keep getting a headache. While on holiday we heard that big fun complex on Isle of White, 'Summerland' burnt down. 49 killed. 3 10 year old kids have been fined £3 each for breaking in.

Sept 19th (Wed)
Been in a rotten stinking mood all day, feel a bit better now. Not much to say. Being a prefect hasn't done much yet. Dum de dum de dum.

Sept 20th
After school went to visit old infant headmistress, Mrs Harrison - good to see her. was surprised to find that she went to Hulme as well. She taught Miss Ashton. She's lovely still. I remember her giving me a prize and smelling of apple pie.

There is Mrs Harrison on the right of this photo. She was married to the other teacher, Mr Harrison. This was infant school, 1966. I'm on the second row, third from the right, with the fetching bow in my hair.


*Commentary
Sept 17 - When I say I am going on a computer course here, bear in mind this is 1973, when computers were big enough to occupy whole rooms, like wardrobes lining the walls. Dad was very keen that I went on this - which was a special course for those doing maths 'A' level, and it was with boy sixth formers! Dad thought that the future was computers and learning Russian. He was not far off the mark. The course was learning to programme using Fortran. is this computer language still about? I don't know. I came away with ticker tape and clueless. This is my memory of it. We'll see what I say about it in my diary entry.

My secret diary 1973 September (i) Paris, then the chemistry lab

Sept 1st (Sat)
In Paris by about 11 o'clock. We did a bit of fussing and faffing and by 2pm we were on metro. I liked going underground to the Champs Elysee and we walked up. Shoes £32! Dresses £132!! Saw Arc dr Triomphe and grave of unknown warrior  Lovely. Got permanent fire. Also Tour Eiffel and we met 3 French blokes.

Sept 2
After Paris last night we drove to Calais and got a ferry at about 10.30am. Not much to say - had a rough crossing. I like ferries but felt a bit sick. Drove all way up to home. Glad to be home. I love my family. Julie got all her 'O' levels. Good, good, good.

Sept 3 (Mon)
Very boring and depressing day. I wish I were back in Spain at Camping Giverola Pola. Simple Simon. Oh God I'm in love with someone I'll never see again! S failed her chem, poor thing. E's done well gor 4 grade 1s.

Sept 4th
Done hardly owt today. Went to dentist (Mr Aron) in afternoon and he gave me a new brace. Coming back I saw a hippy type playing guitar outside of cathedral. I wanted to join him but I'm a coward - it's got to change. I walked from the station in bare feet.

Sept 5th
Went to visit Ju this morning. Had dinner there (her ear's bad). After went to laundry to visit them*. Then up town - new pair of school shoes. 6th former tomorrow - how about that? Saw C in town. Got 7 'O' levels. I'm glad for her.

Sept 6th (Thur)
Well. Went back to school. In sixth form now.Miss Rogerson is form mistress in chem lab. Doing Maths, Biol and Chem for 'A' level'. D only got 4 'O' levels - she's not coming back. IP got 7 grade 1s, C got 4 grade 1s, SP got 6 grade 1s, K got 5 like me*. Great to see everyone again.

Sept 7th
Another mucked up day. Miss Crabtree* still hasn't sorted our timetables out and so Ju doesn't know what she's doing, neither does S. Went to ??, the jewellers about a job that Stella promised me - nothing doing. Stella left. Annoyed. Posted letter to Sian and Sarah.

*Commentary
Sept 5 - Ju and I worked in the hospital laundry to raise money to go on holiday - it was hot, hard work - respect to those who did it full time.
Sept 6 - sometimes I claim not to be a competitive person, but clearly this is a weighing up of everyone and comparing them to my performance. My grown up me is a little embarrassed with my teenage me. Maybe I'm still like that. Oh dear.
Sept 7 - Miss Crabtree was our headmistress. She was a bit like the Queen. Sian and Sarah were girls we had met on holiday in Spain.